Other Dummies

Ugh - I've been so depressed. And by depressed I mean like how Chunk in Goonies went into the kitchen and shot whipped cream (or was it cheese whiz?) into his mouth straight from the can depressed. THE Dummy's first victim, who we adore, leaves on Friday for much MUCH happier, greener pastures. I'm so sad about it that it makes it hard to write about THE Dummy and all her shiz because I don't even want to think about her, that 3-ringed circus act that she is.

Anywho... my friend Pam, who's no dummy, had a suggestion to pick a "Dummy of the Week"... a D-Oh-DubYa for short. Ok so it's not that much shorter but it does pay tribute to the Duke of Dummies in the land of Dummyville. And if you can't figure out who that is, then you are way too Republican, ya dummy!  Anyway... while THE Dummy could win this title week after week with little competition, I will only devote this honor to other deserving dummies.

This Week... Drum Roll Please....  

On 5/14, Richard Rodriguez - a known gang member with a face full of tattoos and his equally handsome friend also with face tattoos (limited to just his chin and neck but oh so delectable), led police on a high speed chase that put several innocent people in harms way. Are they the D-Oh-DubYa's? NO! Come on - this is LA people. On that day there were 2 other police chases, so they are just assholes. Who IS deserving of the award however, is the obviously highly-educated fellow the news interviewed outside a liquor store, on his reaction to the police and their handling of the suspect. (Here is where I would love to insert the clip/name but can't find it...) This Harvard Scholar said how it was "totally uncalled for that those police officers kicked him while he was down. I mean, it sends the message that if I do everything right in surrendering to the police, that I can get beat and that's not right." (Added detail - by "kicked" it was one kick to the head and not a kick parade.)

Ok - sure, he has a valid point. If this was a routine traffic stop and the po-po pulled your ass over, dragged you out of the car, and kicked you, that would be bad. But in this case, if you consider this gang-banger that almost killed a lot of people, and then when his car was disabled rather than giving up, starts running like a bitch, and gets caught only after having no more room to run by the police officers that were risking their lives chasing his dumb ass down for 2 hours, doing everything right when surrendering to police, then you, my friend, are a dummy. The D-Oh-DubYa goes to you, Mr. Thoughtful Dummy. Well deserved. *Applause*